I had an Aha moment last week when I met Mary for lunch. We were talking about how we need to clean our closets out. How we have stuff from decades ago that we simply don’t want to let go. How one of the reasons we were afraid to let go was because it could mean we would forget. And then I started telling her how my memory is lousy. How old friends say, ‘remember when you did this?', or 'said that'. And I had no idea why I could not remember. She said, 'you don’t remember because you were not present.'
Yes. I do not remember because I was not present. I was never comfortable in my skin. I was always upset that things were not better, that I should be somewhere else doing something else, and that I was not better. I was never present. I don’t have a bad memory, I either never made a memory or I decided it was a bad moment I did not want to remember. I was completely absent. Damn. Why did I do that to myself? I missed out. Damn. By choosing to be present, by choosing to not judge, by choosing to accept I could have been happier, calmer and not think I was going senile. If I had chosen to be present, I would have have been able to think about my past and smile at the fond memories.
So what’s the moral of the story? Good things come from eating burgers with friends :) and Be Present. Are you present in this body, in this moment, with this breath? There is no good or bad moment, there is no judgment. Are you here? Completely here? What is this moment teaching you?